Happily Misfit

Ours is the generation of the go-getters, the trendsetters, people who aspire, people who love to climb the ladder at breakneck speed, people who never 'look back' in life, and so on. We are the driving force of the world, it seems. There might be no doubting that. One such 'trendsetter' happens to be a good acquaintance. She has all the attributes of a 'go-getter'. At the top of the corporate ladder at age 37. Nowhere left to climb further. Slogged at work almost till the day she was about to deliver her first child. Going by the standards of our times, I would suppose she would be the one of the happiest people alive. After all, what more could one want from life? I asked her a simple question on getting to know that she had made it to the topmost rung of the ladder. "You're happy, aren't you?" The answer,"I'll ask you the same question when you are 37. At my age, you do not do things that make you happy. Rather, you find happiness in whatever it is that you happen to be doing." I was momentarily at a loss for words. I hadn't expected this answer. No ways. But then, maybe 'achievers' are not supposed to feel happy about themselves in our times.
A soon-to-be married friend's house. The topic of discussion meandered towards the purpose of one's life. We had been talking about how today, young parents want the best (read most expensive) education for their children. And even when they could ill-afford to do so. Then the question arose, what is the purpose of the current generation? Only to bring up the future generation in as expensive a manner as it can, believing it to be the best way of upbringing children? No, everyone felt. Ideally not. There had to be more to life that this. Not that everybody wanted to do so. But then, the favourite whipping boy, 'peer pressure', was blamed. 'Karna padta hai'. Is one happy doing so? Certainly not. Does one feel like doing something to remedy the situation? No. I am amazed. Most of us are not really happy with the lives we are leading in the first place. On top of that, young couples are burdened with the societal pressures of bringing up children in the best (read most expensive) manner possible. Is this the life that we are supposed to be living? What happened to the investment banker who used to love writing poetry? Hasn't put pen to paper for the last 4 years, I am told. What about the chartered accountant who used to love painting? Has almost forgotten how it feels to hold a paintbrush in his hands.
The big new car? We have it. A house at Malabar Hill? Slogging day and night towards it, many will make it there. The vacation to Egypt? Been there last month itself. Satisfaction in life? You gotta be kidding. Satisfaction at work? Don't even talk about it. Thats a paradox, isn't it? Satisfaction? Work? If its work, its got to be tedious, boring, a daily struggle, a necessary evil so that I can have the next big car before my colleague buys it, so that I can buy an even bigger house, so that I can go back to Egypt again to temporarily escape the dull drab drudgery thats my work.
I start thinking about myself. I desire something too. No, its not that big new car. No, its not a house at Malabar Hill. Its not that overseas vacation either. I desire something more basic. I desire to do work. Good work. Work that creates. Work that is fulfilling. Work that leaves an imprint. I want to be remembered by the work that I have done, not by how much of a fortune I leave behind. Above all, I want to feel happy and satisfied after a good day's work. If I can do that, then everything else is a by-product of that feeling. I am a misfit, it seems. Maybe I am. But I am happy. Happy to be a misfit.